The healing nest.
nest: a place affording snug refuge or lodging; a home.
"It is what it is but it doesn’t have to be if you don’t like it."
Just sayin’
"Most of us do not take these situations as teachings. We automatically hate them. We run like crazy. We use all kinds of ways to escape — all addictions stem from this moment when we meet our edge and we just can’t stand it. We feel we have to soften it, pad it with something, and we become addicted to whatever it is that seems to ease the pain."
 Pema Chödrön
Anonymous:
Dressing as in my clothes. Sorry I wasn't specific enough!

Ohhhh my god I feel like such an idiot! haha! SO SORRY!!!!!!!! That’s what a “dressing” is…oops! 

Gosh! Your clothes! If someone judges you on your clothes then they are a total douche bag! I don’t understand judgement full stop but I honestly don’t understand the judgement people have towards what people choose to wear. If you love the clothes you wear, be proud and confident in them and that’s all he will notice, the person BEHIND the clothes. After all, they are just bits of fabric…far less important than who you are, your heart and your soul. My last suggestion still applies though, you could tell him you are worried about it, start a converstaion about it and see what he has to say! He might surprise you and help relieve a LOT of the anxiety about meeting up! :) Goodluck and sorry again! xoxo

"If someone comes along and shoots an arrow into your heart, it’s fruitless to stand there and yell at the person. It would be much better to turn your attention to the fact that there’s an arrow in your heart…"
Pema Chödrön
"Rather than letting our negativity get the better of us, we could acknowledge that right now we feel like a piece of shit and not be squeamish about taking a good look."
Pema Chödrön
Anonymous:
I met a guy on the internet. We have been texting for a month plus now, all day and everyday. Problem is that I'm too self-conscious about my dressing to meet up with him. Any advise?

I’m sorry lovely, what do you mean by your dressing?? Do you mean a SH dressing? If so, there is nothing to be ashamed of, if this guy is into you, he is into YOU…not your scars or the dressing or the pain behind them, he will only care for you and be concerned for you. Maybe you could have a conversation with him via text about it before you meet up? Tell him the truth about why you feel too self conscious to meet up. It’s always easier when it’s not face to face and you will be able to get a sense of the level of sensitivity & understanding he has towards that kind of thing? GOODLUCK!! I am SOOOO sorry if this is not what you meant? xoxoxox

Love, love, love this blog!!!!! It's perfect :) Do you have any blogs that are similar which you could recommend?? <3

Aw thanks gorgeous! I have a link on my blog that says “Super warriors” there are some kick arse people in there! :) I am hopeless at updating it though so some links might be old!!! xxxx

Anonymous:
hi! i have a problem. so there's this guy((he lives in another town, 2 hours away from me; we see each other just like once a month)) and we're kind of in a relationship,but kinda not? i dont know how to explain.. we like each other veeeery much but none of us is really in love with the other so we decided not to call it a relationship but rather a "getting to know each other"-kind of phase. so my BIG problem is, that i have slept recently with another guy..

[…] i’m regretting this SO much,you can’t even imagine.. i dont want to tell him. i’m really afraid that i will lose him due to this incident.. well at least i know now that i’m in love with him, because otherwise i wouldn’t feel like i had betrayed him; which i hadn’t because we’re not in a relationship you know?! argh! he asked me recently if something has happened in the time we haven’t seen each other and i lied to him.. i don’t know what to do anymore i feel so guilty!!

Aw lovely! I’m sorry you’re feeling so horrible! Guilt really is a soul cruncher. I can’t tell you what is going to be best for you both in terms of what to do, only you can truly answer that…but I do want to say that while I completely understand how you feel guilty and like you have betrayed him, you are NOT a bad person. You said it yourself, you weren’t in a relationship with him, there were (as far as I understand from what you’ve said) no rules against being with other people and out of this situation has come a HUGE positive…you have realised that maybe your feelings for him go a lot deeper than you first realised. Maybe focus on that realisation rather than how you came to that realisation?

So I’m not saying that this is definitely what you should do but one option would be to be open and honest with him up front. Tell him that you slept with someone else and that you weren’t honest with him about it because you were afraid of losing him and the whole thing has made you realise that you do really, really like him and perhaps want to talk about the relationship becoming more “serious”? I know that if someone said that to me I would have so much respect and love for them. It would make me feel good to know that being with someone else made them realise they wanted to be with me, you know? I can’t tell you for sure if that is how he will respond but it’s a definite possibility. There is also no better way to start off a relationship than with honesty and openness! Goodluck sweetheart, please let me know how it goes, whatever you decide to do. 

xoxo 

 
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